If you've had a problem sending e-mails from this site: (a) Sorry - it's working now, and (2) Click here for more details.
homeblack pixel
Click to visit the 'fritter™' page
[where you've been: home...,motorsport...,f1...,news...,
menu bar
  menu bar menu bar menu bar  



the dotdotdotcomma f1 newsdesk
the latest f1 news only slightly after it's happened
MANTA translation assistant
(see help page for details)
Don't know who we're
talking about? Click on
the MANTA logo for help
"I don't make mistakes. I make prophesies
that immediately turn out to be wrong."  

The dotdotdotcomma newsdesk is entirely fictional. There aren't any real people here at all. So what's new?

The news items on this page are also available as an RSS feedRSS logo and an Atom feedAtom logo, depending on whether you like your motorsport satire tinted orange or blue.

dotdotdotcomma F1 News

F1: Bunsen Jet-on burgled on holiday by Virgil Ellipse
7th Aug 2015
Bunsen Jet-on and his wife Jessica are said to be "unsurprisingly shaken" after their Saint-Tropez villa was burgled.

The couple had been holidaying with friends at a rented villa in the french resort when thieves broke into the property and stole a number of belongings while everyone was asleep.

Among the items taken was the engagement ring that Jet-on gave Jessica in 2014, when he was on £12m a year at McLap'em. The ring, which police say is insured for around £250,000, has huge sentimental value and Jessica is said to be extremely upset, particularly after learning how far its value is from the traditional "one month's salary".

It is understood that the thieves also made off with a necklace, some earrings and a Gucci sunglasses case, which Jessica uses as a handy travel container for her entire collection of underwear. Honestly, she'll catch her death, that one.

The thieves had attempted to steal Jet-on's McLap'em 540C road car, fitted with a prototype Unda power unit, but the engine shut down after 500 yards and the thieves abandoned the car to continue their getaway on foot, keeping their balaclavas on to avoid having to talk to the press about how disappointing their season has been.

<< previous item << news menu >> next item >>

RELATED NEWS ITEMS:
F1 Pre-season testing round-up 10th Feb 2012
F1 Unda look to suspension to move forward 23rd Jul 2008
F1 New Unda makes debut at Valencia 24th Jan 2008
F1 Jet-On rules out race wins in 2008 4th Dec 2007
F1 Jet-on: Homegrown may never be champion 12th Nov 2007
 

KEY TO SERIES NAMES (hovering over the abbreviations in the table above also shows the full series name)
F1Formula 1
The world's most prominent, most expensive and frequently most tedious single-seater series.