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the dotdotdotcomma f1 newsdesk
the latest f1 news only slightly after it's happened
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"I don't make mistakes. I make prophesies
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The dotdotdotcomma newsdesk is entirely fictional. There aren't any real people here at all. So what's new?

dotdotdotcomma F1 News

Click on the headline to view a single story or tick the checkboxes next to the headlines you'd like to see and then click the "View item(s)" button. For a full explanation of the series abbreviations on the left, hover your mouse over them or see the key at the bottom of the page.

The news items on this page are also available as an RSS feedRSS logo and an Atom feedAtom logo, depending on whether you like your motorsport satire tinted orange or blue.

show news stories from   in 

 (The specified date category did not return any items, so the ten most recent items are listed below.)
show allseriesheadlinedate posted
expand item F1 We apologise for the inconvenience..., 26th May 2021
F1: We apologise for the inconvenience..., by Mathias Olaf Uncertain
26th May 2021

*Tap tap*


Is this thing on?

I'm not sure I really trust speech recognition.

Me neither, mate.

No. Well... OK...

Er... hello everybody. How's things? We, er, we... that is to say, Virgil and I, just thought we ought to let you know that we've just popped out for a spot of lunch...

Er, haven't we...?

Yes, I think we have.

Yes, so, if you could just excuse us...

Yes, do excuse us.

...and we'll be back in a short while...

Won't we?

Oh yes, I should think so.

Yes, so, er, thank you. See you in a bit.

I say, would you like another drink?

Oh, rather.

What would you like?

Oh, I don't know... Hey, waiter! Bring me volume three of the wine list...

expand item F1 Chinese Grand Prix: MP4-31 'provisionally fit' to race 14th Apr 2016
expand item F1 F1 records update: on yer Vespa, Michael 3rd Oct 2015
expand item F1 Sober's Monisha Alpenhorn wary of F1 manufacturer tie-up 19th Aug 2015
expand item F1 Bunsen Jet-on burgled on holiday 7th Aug 2015
expand item F1 Homeboy open to closed cockpits in F1 24th Jul 2015
expand item F1 Lewisham Hilton turned away from Centre Court at Wimbledon 13th Jul 2015
expand item F1 Arrivabuses insisted 2015 Ferrarsi designed to suit Kimi 29th Apr 2015
expand item F1 Italy responds to Ecclescake 'a bit like Germany' slur 20th Apr 2015
expand item F1 Malaysian GP: practice update 27th Mar 2015

KEY TO SERIES NAMES (hovering over the abbreviations in the table above also shows the full series name)
F1Formula 1
The world's most prominent, most expensive and frequently most tedious single-seater series.

How it all started - original news items e-mailed between the editors.
Some of our more sensitive readers may find this page slightly less palatable. We use the "F" word and everything.